Evaluating Intercultural Behavior

The hungry ghost festival ended a couple of weeks ago. During this period of time, many local Chinese believers would prepare ritualistic food offerings and burn incense and joss papers for the visiting spirits.

This particular incident that I witnessed involved two neighbours of mine. Neighbour 1 (N1) is a Chinese family while Neighbour 2 (N2) is a Muslim family. N1 was performing his offerings and burning paper incense for his ancestors one of the afternoon during the lunar 7th month. Due to strong wind, the burning ashes started flying all around. Some eventually landed in N2's house which is on the second floor, creating a dusty mess. N2 was very disturbed as his son has asthma and he believes that the ashes would trigger off an asthmatic reaction. Shouting from his window, he confronted N1, insisting that they should not burn so much incense as the ashes will start flying all over. He demanded them to stop immediately, otherwise he would complain to the town council. He even made an insensitive comment stating he don't see why N1 needed to burn those incense!

N1 apparently wasn't very happy with the way N2 confronted him. He argued that B was exaggerating the whole situation and refused to budge. The whole conversation got so tense that everything could be heard from my 4th floor unit. All these while, I was observing from my window. Eventually the whole incident came under control when some other neighbour came down to act as mediator. No compromise was made eventually. Ever since then, the two neighbours' relationship remained sour.

Personally, I feel that since we are living in a multi cultural society, we should all be tolerant, patient and be more accommodating towards different cultural practises. In this situation, I believe that both parties are at fault. On one hand, N1 should have graciously admitted that his actions did affect his neighbours. In addition, he should also have assured N2 that he will be done quickly and apologise for any inconvenience caused. On the other hand, N2 could have been more tolerant of the Chinese cultural norm of burning incense. He should have approached N1 with a more polite tone and negotiated assertively with patience. Both parties should have also develop more cultural self awareness. If all these were done, I believe that they could have reached a win-win situation. The situation could have been avoided if both families could be more sensitive to each other's race and cultural beliefs.
From the conflict, we can actually see that effective communication is vital in intercultural situations. The key to solving this unpleasant conflict is perhaps to be empathetic. Only by putting yourself in other people's shoes, will you be able to understand the other party's expectations and be more sensitive to others' traditions, cultures and feelings.

Painful but very cool?

Any Prison Break fans out there?


Do you recognise him?


And what's your impression of the person featured in the photo below? Is it the same for the previous two photos you have seen?

I do not have a tattoo by the way....

The word "tattoo" comes from the Tahitian "tatau" which simply means to mark.

Tattoos serve different purposes and carry a variety of meanings for various people. For some people, it may represent a symbol of faith, identity, and memory for lost love ones . For others, it could just well be a fashion statement.
Tattoos have the power to leave a strong impression on people, how they perceive you as a person, and maybe even create a strong social stigma.
In the past, tattoo-ing was often associated with triads, gangsters and secret societies. Each gang had its own distinct tattoo, and members who owed allegiance to the group had to have the mark of a tattoo on themselves. Tattooing therefore came to be associated with anti-social activities and people with tattoos were looked down upon.
Recently, I have noticed an increasing number of youths with tattoos walking along the streets. Interestingly enough, an online study indicates that getting tattoos is an increasing popular trend amongst the youths worldwide. Hence I thought maybe this would be an interesting topic to work on for the research project, in a local context. As we move into the 21st century, it would be interesting to find out how the general public percieves youths of generation Y having tattoos. Does having a tattoo carry any social implications on them these days? Are these youths with tattoos still considered deviant or are we open minded enough in today's society to accept their behaviour? Having the answers to these questions, tattoo-ing studios may then be able to develop better strategies to change people's mindset about the art, making people more receptive to tattoo-ing, which will in turn improve their business.

In a nutshell, here's what i propose.

Issue presented:
Increasing trends of youths (GEN Y) getting tattoos in Singapore.

Possible research question:
Do youths (GEN Y) with tattoos carry a social stigma these days? Generation Y population refers to the people born in from 1982 to the mid-1990s.

Survey required?
Yes. Survey is required to get a general opinion on whether there is a social stigma that tags along with a Generation Y individual. If it is proven to carry a social stigma, what are its implications? If proven otherwise, why is it so? People being surveyed will include people from both Generation X and Generation Y to cut down biasness.

Hypothesis:
Having tattoos no longer carry a social stigma for our Generation Y population.

Purpose Statement:
The objective of the report is to determine whether having tattoos carry any social stigma in our Generation Y population these days. Results will then allow tattoo-ing services companies in Singapore to come up with business strategies that overcome possible stereotypes people have and better promote the art of tattoo-ing. The report is also prepared for the general public. The purpose is to let them have a better insight on the current perspective that people have on tattoo-ing among youths these days.

Resolving Interpersonal Conflict

This conflict that I am relating involves a fellow team mate and myself. Being the captain of the varsity climbing team which is quite an individual sport, handling conflicting interests within my team is often inevitable. However, this particular incident disturbed me quite a bit even till now.

Climber XXX was a very performance and goal orientated individual. He believed that the scheduled team training was insufficient for him to excel. He drafted up his own training programme (which was okay as long as he joins everyone for training) and attended scheduled training as and when he wanted. Personally, I felt that his individualistic attitude was not very appropriate as a varsity player and I saw a need to talk to him regarding this issue. And so, there was this night where I managed to catch him online via MSN (which I regretted doing so). My intention was to have a casual chat to understand his stand, to state my opinion and perhaps seek a compromise. However, the conversation turned ugly, with both of us rebuting each other. Phrases such as " Whatever, I don't really care" and "why are you so selfish?" were typed out in CAPS. Eventually, he quit the conversation, saying he was busy. There wasn't much room for negotiation in the conversation and we didn't manage to come to a compromise. He left for SEP the following semester and we never got to resolve our conflict.

The good thing is boys being boys, both of us forgave and forgot about the incident when he returned from SEP. Hence there is no hard feelings between us now.

I believe that the main problem lies within the serious difference in opinions with regards to being part of a team, which led to a lose-lose situation. During the conversation, I must admit that I got rather frustrated and impatient with my team mate's comments. Perhaps my responses to him were too emotionally driven and not judgemental enough. Putting myself in his shoes, I believe he could be feeling the same way as well, irritated by me finding faults at him. Yet , perhaps at the same time he couldn't really be bothered with what I was trying to put across to him.

I am not really certain what truly led to that dead lock situation.

Could it have been..

• the wrong choice of communication channel?


• the wrong timing of the conversation? (it could have a been a tiring day for either one of us?)


• both of us were too headstrong? Refusing to give in as it might be a man's "EGO" issue.


• both of us were too emotionally driven by our own beliefs and not behaving rationally?


• Or was it the tone that we confronted each other with?

Could addressing the above issues, allow us to resolve the conflict amicably?

On a lighter note, the rest of my team continued to train hard and we eventually emerged champion in a National bouldering championship during that semester!

Here's a photo of my team! Can you spot Matthew and me?

Let's communicate

Why is communication important? To me, perhaps one of the most obvious reasons is that we communicate everyday. Communication is all around us - in the form of SMS, Internet chatting, project presentation, electronic mails and even gossips we share during lunchtime. Communication, no doubt is a big part of our lives. Therefore developing effective communication skills is vital in putting our feelings and thoughts across to others which could prevent unnecessary misunderstandings.

Communication is more than just being heard. We cannot be the speaker all the time, hence it is essential for us to also learn to take on the role of a listener. Developing effective communication skills involves active listening- a crucial skill in many occasions i have encountered such as

• listening to a lecture to obtain information
• listening to a project presentation in order to evaluate one's argument
• lending a listening ear to friends in trouble and offering our advice.

Effective communication involves interpreting nonverbal communication cues which is also a reason why we should empower ourselves with these skills. These nonverbal communication cues may seem insignificant but they do send out powerful messages. A moment of an awkward silence during a conversation may indicate that the other party is feeling uncomfortable. Also, seating postures of the audience could serve to indicate how interested they are in the presentation. These are all personal real life encounters which underline the importance of effective communication.

Maintaining a vast social network through communication opens up job opportunities through friends'/lecturers' recommendations and also forms a support group upon which I can rely on whenever help is needed. Things get done faster too, through friends' connections within workplaces.

Personally, i feel that these skills are not only applicable in working environment, but useful for fostering strong family bonds. Generation gaps can be bridged and conversations could be more open if we use the right communication techniques to address family issues.

Effective communication is a life long skill. Graduating in two years time, i really hope to find my dream job. Drafting an excellent resume and job application letter will definitely increase the chances of me attaining this goal. This is when effective written communication comes in. Furthermore, job interviews will never be as stressful as it used to be with the right communication skills!

Everyone can communicate, but not everyone is an effective communicator. Realising that effective communication skills are important in our lives brings us one step closer to being one.

Finally, here's an interesting screen shot of National Day Rally 2007! ENJOY!


Tired or bored?You decide. For the full article, visit this forum- http://forums.vr-zone.com/showthread.php?t=178693 =)